For those of us who were raised in a culture other than the ones our parents identified with (where my military brats at?!), this is our category! “TCK” is short for Third Culture Kid, and thanks to technology allowing people to work from anywhere they wish in the world, our numbers are growing!
TCK: Third Culture Kid, a term for kids who are raised in a culture other than the ones their parents identify with.
Like many of my friends, I actually grew up in a multicultural household as well as lived in another culture: my mom is Korean, my dad is American, and I primarily grew up in Japan. Even though I was an American citizen, the culture shock I experienced upon moving “home” to the states was staggering (I never permanently lived here until I left for college at eighteen!).
Some culture shock moments that stuck out to me:
had no idea what Craigslist was
what was Target and why was everyone always excited to go?
restaurant portions!
hitting my windshield wipers instead of my turn signal
walking to the driver’s side instead of the passenger’s when friends were driving
there’s no more Robin Hood or Anthony’s Pizza
Chili’s was not everyone’s go-to for special occasions
I still don’t really understand health insurance...
not having to show your ID everywhere you go
there’s more than one movie at the theater!
Tipping (In Japan, the tip is included in the overall price in situations where you’d tip in the states; it’s actually considered rude in most instances to leave more money than the bill)
For any TCK, the hardest question to answer is the simplest, and most-used introductory question besides “What’s your name?” And that is: “Where are you from?” Oh man. Where do I say? Do I say where I was born, what my ethnicity is, where I most recently moved from, where I lived the longest, or where my favorite place was? No matter what I say, there’s no response that I feel answers that question.
Where do I most feel at home? On any military base! Haha! But even then, I graduated college early and the military took away my ID (still so salty about this 😂) so now I’m officially a part of that community and still not at the same time. No matter where I say, I am both “from” there, and yet not from there at all.
I can't speak for everyone, but at least for me, the longing for a place to belong somewhere never really goes away.
Yet despite this, I will always be grateful for this unique experience and wouldn’t ever trade it for a more traditional upbringing. For the most part, TCK's get pretty good at adjusting to change & new surroundings quickly; forming friendships wherever they go with the understanding that when either moves, it's never "good-bye" but a "see you later;" having a sensitivity and appreciation for other cultures, and I personally love that no matter where I travel to (or have a long layover), there's almost always someone I know in the area that I can hit up for a drink & chat!
I love meeting other TCK's and hearing all their fun quirks of "You know you're a TCK when..." and for me, my girlfriends love to remind me I'm a TCK when I cook scrambled eggs with chopsticks (it's not weird, they really are the best in making the perfect scrambled eggs! I've converted several American friends to swap out their spatula spoons for chopsticks)! My multilingual friends and I will also use a blend of English/Korean/Japanese vocabulary when we talk with each other without realizing it.
So…where do I consider home? As corny as it sounds, the only honest answer I can say is home is with my family, wherever they may be. Home for this TCK will never be one house with fond childhood memories or a town with all of my childhood friends. It will always be a feeling I have being around the ones I love.
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